


what should've been said (was left unsaid)

by tornlinson



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Break Up, Breaking Up & Making Up, Fluff and Angst, Human Loki (Marvel), Idiots in Love, Jealous Loki (Marvel), Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, M/M, Post-Break Up, Second Chances, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, but can't communicate with each other for shit, but still, engagement ring - Freeform, i know i wrote them, they are such fools
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-28
Updated: 2019-05-28
Packaged: 2020-03-26 12:37:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19005958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tornlinson/pseuds/tornlinson
Summary: It was about time Tony returned the engagement ring to the store - a year was more than enough time for him to move on from what had happened, or, well, what could've happened. Really, being dumped on the day he decided to propose was definitely not at the top of Tony's list.The problem was that parting with the ring would be parting with his last memory of Loki. The other problem was that Loki was right there, had seen the ring on Tony's palm and jumped into his own conclusion. The irony was never lost on him.A story of several misunderstandings, two lovers and a single diamond ring.





	what should've been said (was left unsaid)

**Author's Note:**

> right, so this is based on a prompt i read somewhere AGES ago and i had it noted down, but i cannot for the life of me remember where i saw it, so if anyone identifies this prompt please tell me who can give credit to!
> 
> prompt: person A is going to return the engagement ring he bought for person B a year ago right before person B had ended the relationship, only to bump into person B on the way to the store.
> 
> also, loki isn't a villian in this. he's just a normal dude. so let's assume the new york invasion didn't happen, for research purposes.

* * *

“ _Tony!”_ A sharp voice snaps him out of his thoughts, and then it continues, softer now, “It’s been a year. You can’t keep holding onto him like this.” Pepper’s eyes are filled with concern, flicking down to the ring that Tony cradled in his palm.

She had been clearing Tony’s desk for him when her fingers had grazed against a velvet box, tucked away into the furthest corner of his drawer that Pepper would’ve almost missed it if it weren’t for her wandering hands. With a slight inkling of what would be inside, Pepper had opened the box, seen what was inside and then angrily called out for Tony. He stepped into the room a few seconds later, looking sheepish until he catches sight of of Pepper’s face – a mixture of anger and disappointment – and the ring she was holding up in front of her. Face visibly paling, Tony had raced across the room and snatched the ring from her fingers, almost like exposing it to someone else’s touch would ruin it.

He hadn’t paid attention to Pepper after that, knowing that the gist of her lecture would be about _moving on, letting go_ and more words that he’s only gotten used to ever since Loki left. When Pepper’s words finally sink in – it _has_ been a year, hasn’t it? – Tony tears his eyes away from the ring and looks up at Pepper.

“Yeah,” He exhales in defeat, shifting his eyes away from Pepper’s penetrating stare. Her concern towards him absolutely terrified him – he was never used to being a subject of worry and concern without a greater intent behind it. “I’ll return it.”

“Really?” Even Pepper’s taken aback, face shifting into a mixture of subtle confusion and relief.

“Yeah. You know, in fact,” Tony shifts the ring from one hand to another, before looking back at her. “I’ll do it right now.” He doesn’t give Pepper a chance to say anything in response before he’s spun on his heel and walked out the door. She hears a distant, “ _Thanks, Pep!”_ right before the elevators _ding_ closed.

“Well, _that_ was easy,” Pepper says, still surprised at the sudden turn of events, as she continues to clear Tony’s desk.

“ _It most certainly was, Miss Potts,”_ comes JARVIS’ reply.

 

Tony decides to walk. The store is only 10 minutes away, but considering that he’s been cooped up in his tower for the majority of the past year, he might as well make the trip worth it. He twirls the ring between his fingers, thinking back to the day he bought it. July 12th – the date is fresh in his mind – the date he figured that _yeah, this is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with._ He had told JARVIS that if Loki asks about his whereabouts, to just say he’s in a meeting with Pepper. JARVIS would’ve never kept Tony’s hunt for an engagement ring a secret from Loki unless he was specifically told to do so. He hadn’t expected Loki and JARVIS to grow so close during the past few months. He also hadn’t expected to go back home and see an absolutely _resigned_ Loki seated on the couch, body language anything but comfortable. A cold feeling of dread grew in Tony’s chest, and his smile dropped. Then the words started tumbling out of Loki’s mouth – _I can’t do this anymore, Tony. I’m sorry. It’s not your fault. It’s been on my mind for a long time. Better late than never_ and the one that completely wrecked Tony, _I’ll never forget how happy you used to make me._ Past tense. _Used to_. The velvet box inside his coat pocket had suddenly felt too heavy, mocking him at the irony of the situation. Tony couldn’t even frame a sentence, could only nod dumbly as Loki leaves. He realized only later that Loki had shifted out all his belongings while Tony was gone, and was only waiting for Tony to come back so he break the news. Loki hadn’t even given Tony a chance, decision made as soon as started separating his things from Tony’s before moving them out of the house.

He looks at the ring in his hand, glinting in the sunlight, thinking of the significance it held. _An act of love, an act of permanency,_ _an act of moving on._ So engrossed in his thoughts, Tony barely registered the voice that that grew closer to him, barely registered the standing figure in front of him right until he bumped straight into their back. Tony almost drops the ring, a small cry escaping his mouth right before he bends and catches before it hits the ground. The person had stopped talking on the phone, silent now, and Tony mutters a soft sorry as he brushes past the figure, eyes locked on the ring in his hand.

“Tony?” A familiar voice asks, and Tony freezes mid-step, only now realizing why the voice had sounded familiar right before Tony bumped into them. The ring on his palm is suddenly _too cold_ and _too heavy._ Tony turns.

Loki still looks so beautiful – pale, porcelain skin against striking black hair that was combed back and curled at the nape of his neck. Rich green eyes that Tony had grown to find comfort it, and lips that Tony missed kissing. Loki wore a dark green shirt – he always loved green – with the top two buttons unbuttoned to reveal a smooth expanse of milky skin, paired with black jeans that clung to his legs like a second skin. It’s only Tony’s self-preservation that prevents him from openly gaping at the sight of Loki.

When Loki realizes that Tony’s complete attention is on him, he turns his face away every so slightly and speaks into the phone – a soft _call you later_ – before hanging up. His mouth pulls into a hesitant smile, eyes bright when he looks back at Tony again, scanning Tony before abruptly stopping his gaze at Tony’s outstretched palm. _Idiot!_ He mentally curses himself, _close your fist!_

It’s too late, Loki’s seen it. The confused flicker of his eyes back up to Tony’s is all that was needed to confirm his theory. Tony closes his fist anyway.

“Hi,” is all Tony can say for lack of a better response, but it sounds almost cold and uninviting. Disappointment flashes in Loki’s eyes, and Tony’s suddenly reminded of the day Loki left him. He had the same look in his eyes. He needs to _not_ see it on Loki’s face, so he continues. “Uh. How are you?”

“Good!” Loki almost jumps at the opening. “I’m still at the museum – I got promoted. Assistant curator.” He smiles, and it’s so genuine and pure that Tony smiles in return. “How have you been?”

“That’s great.” Tony says, because it really _is._ Loki was so passionate about the museum he worked at, believed that he could contribute much more than being a guide. It was all he had ever talked about. He catches Loki’s expectant gaze, realizes he was asked a question and then clears his throat.

“The same,” Tony shrugs unhelpfully. “Well, Pepper’s looking after the business now. She deserves it more than I do anyway.”

“Pepper,” Loki repeats, and Tony notices that it sounds strange coming from his mouth, as if a suspicion was just cleared. He watches as Loki motions to Tony’s closed fist. “The ring is for her.” It’s not even a question, Tony realizes. Loki made it a statement, accepting the weight of his words as he spoke them out loud.

“ _Pepper?_ ” Tony echoes, voice high pitched. “No. _No._ We’re not – I’m not. She’s just my business partner. This ring was for– “ _Don’t say it, don’t even think about it._ “I was returning it.”

Tony’s avoiding his gaze, but his entire attention was still on Loki. There’s a sharp intake of breath, and from the corner of his eyes, Tony sees Loki take a small step away in shock. Failing to resist the urge, he finally looks at Loki, watches his face as realization dawns across his features. He meets wide green eyes, sees lips trembling as they part, and Loki’s shaking his head – subtle, but it’s there. Tony wants to crawl into a hole and die rather than being under the gaze of Loki who just figured out that Tony was planning to marry him. He also figures out that _that_ was the moment their conversation started going downhill.

“When did you buy it?” Loki’s voice is barely above a whisper – pained and shaky with heavy breathing.

“Look, it’s not important. I don’t even know _why_ –“

 _“When did you buy it?”_ Loki sharply cuts him off, and it takes a second for Tony to realize that green eyes are turning glassy. Tony can’t bring himself to say the date out loud, can’t bring himself to acknowledge the impact the day had on him - but Loki looks so desperate, eyes pleading for Tony’s answer. Tony’s vaguely aware of the worried glances from people walking past them on the street.

“12th of July,” Tony eventually says, and Loki’s face crumbles at that – making him look absolutely devastated. A soft whimper escapes his mouth.

“You didn’t tell me.” His voice was shaky, uncertain. “You- You let me say all those cruel words to you while you had an engagement ring in your possession. You were going to _propose_ and you didn’t – you didn’t even _tell_ me. You just let me walk out.” A pause, and Loki takes a deep breath. Tony can see he’s having a hard time controlling himself. “Were you ever going to tell me?”

“I never thought I’d see you again,” Tony defends lamely. It’s the truth – well, _partially._ While he hoped that he’d never see Loki again, he’d been trying his best to ensure that he _doesn’t_. That was one of the reasons why he had never stepped foot out of his apartment. Realizing that Pepper was perfect to run the business only contributed to Tony’s reasoning to stay inside the apartment. He didn’t have to attend most meetings, didn’t have to show his face in public as often as he used to – unless it was really important. The thought of seeing Loki, the smallest possibility that he _might,_ and being reminded of the first time he fell in love, the first time he wanted to marry someone only to have the idea completely shattered, would’ve been too much for Tony to handle. But who was he kidding? He obviously couldn’t have hid forever.

“If I hadn’t seen the ring, would you have told me today?”

Tony suddenly hates that Loki’s asking so many questions. It feels like Loki’s digging into a wound that just started healing, tearing and pulling it apart until it would finally leave a big gaping hole, way past any chance of healing. Something inside him snaps.

“No, I wouldn’t have.” Tony grits out, his demeanour changing in the blink of an eye. “In fact, I would’ve _never_ mentioned it so that I could save myself from _this exact scenario_. I don’t want to be confronted with what I did – actually, not even something I _did_ , but something that was just a _thought_ . And on that day, you told me exactly what you felt, Loki, and a ring wasn’t going to change that. You said you’ve been thinking of doing it for _ages,_ actually. So, _forgive me_ for thinking that it wasn’t important enough to mention.”

He angrily shoves the ring back into his jean pocket, internally cursing himself for not doing it the minute he stepped outside his building, and walks past Loki. He doesn’t look at Loki’s face as he walks past, and is only slightly irritated at the way Loki side-stepped from Tony to give him more space to walk, and that Loki would _still_ let them drift apart so easily.

 

Tony realizes too late that he’s walking in the wrong direction, and is well on his way back home. He pauses, just about to turn around when he decides against the possibility of seeing Loki somewhere in the area. There’s always time tomorrow.

Pepper’s not there when the elevator doors open, not even in his bedroom, but the table is cleared, so he assumes she left. Tony breathes out in relief, glad that he wouldn’t have to face Pepper catching him in a lie, which obviously doesn’t go unnoticed by JARVIS.

“ _Sir. Would I be right in assuming that the ring is still in your possession?”_

“Maybe,” Tony says, and JARVIS’ silence is almost judgmental. He casts a wary glance at one of JARVIS’ cameras. “What? I’m giving it back tomorrow, okay? Don’t tell Pep.”

“Just had a… minor hiccup on the way,” He mutters, mostly to himself as he plops down on the sofa, leans back and stretches his legs over the table. “You know what I need? A nap.” He folds his arms across his chest and is just shutting his eyes when–

“ _Would that minor hiccup be Loki, sir?”_

–his eyes snap open, body immediately straightening. He’s instantly curious as to how JARVIS figured _that_ out.

“Wha– How’d you know that? You readin’ minds now, J? ‘Cause if you are, I think I’m obliged to know.”

“ _He’s just entered the building, sir. His code still works, you haven’t cleared it from my database yet.”_

“Okay. In my defence, I wasn’t really expecting him to show up here after he left. What’s he doin’?” Tony asks, leaning back against the comfort of his sofa.

“ _He’s in the elevator. On his way to the penthouse.”_

“ _What?”_ Tony sits up straight, _again_ , and glares at one of JARVIS’ camera. “You couldn’t lead with  _that_?”

“ _Apologies,”_ JARVIS says, sounding the least bit apologetic. He was about to give his AI a good mouthful when the elevators _ding_ open. Narrowing his eyes, he silently mouths _betrayer_ to the camera before turning to Loki.

Loki, who suddenly looks very hesitant to step out of the elevator. His eyes had landed on Tony for a brief second before they started scanning the room in uncertainty. Tony had changed a lot of the interiors after Loki had left, for lack of anything else to do while he was holed up inside for a good number of months.

“If you keep standing there, the elevator doors are gonna–“ And as if on cue, they start sliding and Tony sees a flash of panic on Loki’s face before he quite _literally_ jumps out of the elevator.

An entire minute, Loki still hadn’t made an attempt to speak – only looking strangely out of place as he stood in front of the elevators and continued taking his time to look around as if Tony wasn’t _waiting_ for him to speak at _all_. So, Tony decides to initiate a conversation he would probably end up regretting.

“What? Did you forget something here?” Tony asks impatiently. Loki’s eyes snap to Tony, as if just realizing that he had arrived with an intention. “You’re a year late, by the way.”

“You don’t have to talk to me like that.” Loki narrows his eyes, and if he’s hurt at the tone that Tony used, he doesn’t show it.

“I don’t have to talk to you at all, actually.”

Loki sighs, lips pursing shut, and decides that he should probably start the conversation over, because the current one was leading to nowhere.

“You said it wasn’t important enough to mention,” Loki starts, and the pause is all Tony needs to be an asshole and break in.

“Did you seriously just come back here to repeat my words back  _at_ me?”

“And,” Loki continues, conveniently ignoring Tony’s words. “While it may not have been important for you, it was important to me. I would not have left if you had told me. The fact that you didn’t even fight for me, and let me go so easily was a horrible confirmation of my fear.”

“Fear? _What-?”_

“I saw the way Pepper looked at you when she thought no one was watching, saw the way her gaze lingered on you even after you ceased your incessant chatter. It took me some time, but I eventually realized how much you depend on her, like how you would depend on a significant other. I realized that her presence often made you very happy, and you would smile at her the same way you smiled at me–“

“You’re kidding me, right?” Tony interrupts, about to start defending himself when Loki shoots him a _look._ He immediately keeps his mouth shut.

“I spent _weeks_ hoping that what I kept seeing was just a figment of my imagination. Hoping that you hadn’t started to reciprocate her feelings. I was so desperate to talk to you, to _find out_ whether it was only a projection of my imagination. But I was so scared. I would hate myself if you had accepted your feelings with Pepper, but I would have absolutely despised myself if I had accused you of cheating on me if the thought hadn’t even crossed your mind.” Loki steps forward, sniffing slightly as tears brimmed in his eyes. “12th of July. You weren’t home, and JARVIS said that you were with–

“Pepper,” Tony whispers. He can’t _believe_ what he’s hearing, trying to register Loki’s words felt like trying to gulp down an entire apple. Loki merely nods at Tony’s response, sniffing.

“And I thought, _this is it_." There's a bitter smile on Loki's face when he continues, "It had gone too far, and I wanted to leave _immediately._ Your absence had given me more than enough time to pack and send my things to my brothers home. I didn’t want to wait for you, couldn’t even think about facing you whenever you’d come back. But I couldn’t leave you without saying anything, and leaving a note would’ve been too cruel, so I stayed. When you came back, and you just let me continue speaking, I was growing angrier with every second. You weren’t even trying to defend yourself, didn’t even put an effort into making sure that I wouldn’t leave. You looked resigned, just as much as I had, and when you let me leave without a single word falling from your lips, I could only identify it with one emotion – guilt.”

“Oh my god,” Tony says, because what _else_ could he say? He stands up, slowly making his way to Loki. “Loki. I didn’t know. _God-_ If I’d known. I mean, yeah, I’ve always relied on Pepper. She’s been with me from the _beginning,_ Lokes. I was so used to her as a my pillar of support, that I barely even considered how you’d feel seeing that from your perspective. I didn’t know she had feelings for me, Loki, I _swear._ I’m so _sorry._ I told JARVIS to tell you I was with her, because he would never have lied to you even though it compromised my plan. God, Pepper was just an _excuse!_ I wasn’t even meeting her, hell, I hadn’t seen her all _day_! I just wanted enough time to get you the perfect ring, Lokes.” He had stopped inches away from Loki, and it took all his effort to not run his fingers through Loki’s hair and pull him into a kiss. He watches as Loki tries blink back his tears furiously, avoiding complete eye contact from Tony.

“Today, I was _so happy_ to see you, and I couldn’t for the life of me remember why I left you. Couldn’t remember why I didn’t talk to you, or didn’t even give you a chance before I left. And then I saw the ring, and when you mentioned Pepper – it was right there in front of me. There was a horrible feeling that crept up on me, that I was right. It hurt, so much more than I expected it to. Over a year, and it still hurt in a way it shouldn’t have.” Loki looks at Tony now, green eyes shimmering with welled up tears. “And when you implied that it wasn’t for Pepper, but had been for someone else, and you were returning it, I couldn’t even breathe, couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that you were planning to _marry_ me. _God_ , I must have absolutely broken your heart that day. Tony, I am _so sorry._ I would apologize to you a _million_ times if you wanted me to.” He wipes the tear that’s rolling down his cheek with the back of his hand, and continues in a whisper. “If only I had talked to you.”

Tony then wraps his arms around Loki and brings him closer, pulling him into a tight hug. The soft sound of surprise that Loki makes is enough for Tony to realize that Loki was equally shocked as him with the sudden action. Loki’s body, tensed at the moment of contact, starts to melt against Tony. He wraps his arms around Tony, palm flat against his back and lets the floodgates open. There are tears and heavy sobs escaping Loki’s mouth, and Tony can hear incoherent words bubbling out of Loki’s mouth in the midst of his sobbing. He is quite literally _shaking_ against Tony, clinging on to Tony as though letting go would make him fall, and chest heaving in a rapid motion of breathing as Tony starts rubbing circles in his back. He turns, presses a soft kiss against Loki’s cheek in an attempt to comfort him, and realizes the outcome of his action the minute Loki stills.

“Please,” Loki’s voice is muffled against Tony’s shoulder, can feel the warmness of Loki’s breath through the thin fabric of his shirt that separates skin from lips. “Don’t do it if you don’t mean it.”

“I mean it,” Tony says, watching as Loki lifts his head and angles it towards Tony. Their mouths are a breath apart, and neither of them know who moves first, but suddenly they’re kissing. Loki’s whimpering against him, hands gripping Tony tightly as their lips move softly with each other. Tony realized just how much he _missed_ Loki, missed his touch, his warmth and the sense of comfort that Tony always felt when Loki was around. Loki was so close to him, so _familiar_ in every way that he used to be, and Tony tries to inhale Loki’s scent as much as he could. Soft kisses turn harder, more desperate as they try to make up for all the lost time, all those months when they could’ve been _engaged – married,_ even – as hands start roaming across the others’ body.

They pull apart after what felt like ages, breathing heavily as they press their foreheads together. Loki’s eyes are shut, and Tony finds himself unable to look away from Loki’s face, which is so full of relief, relishing in their close proximity, relishing in the _comfort_ of each other.

“I love you,” Tony whispers, and watches as Loki lips pull into a small smile.

“I love you,” Loki repeats, finally opening his eyes to look at Tony, who – well – almost melts at the sight of Loki’s eyes that are so full of love and adoration. “ _God,_ I  _missed_ you. Can we start over?”

“I don’t think I could go through a first date knowing what you look like right after an orgasm,” Tony replies, to which Loki laughs, pressing his lips against Tony for a brief second before pulling back.

“I have a better idea, though.”

“Yeah?” Loki asks, eyes glinting with joy.

“Yeah. Perfect timing actually,” Tony nods, reaching into his pocket. “See, I have this ring–“

Loki doesn’t let him finish. Instead, he grabs Tony by his collar and smashes their lips together in a movement that can only mean _yes._

**Author's Note:**

> hope you liked it! ❤️


End file.
